


The Pain of Rotting

by Hamimifk (BatchSan)



Category: The Virgin Suicides - Jeffrey Eugenides
Genre: Angst, Chan (non-explicit), Child Abuse, Dark, F/F, Porn Battle, Sibling Incest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-08-11
Updated: 2010-08-11
Packaged: 2017-10-11 01:06:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,744
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/106593
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BatchSan/pseuds/Hamimifk
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>[Pre-book/movie.] <i>'It started as a scab in our lives - Therese hit puberty and developed breasts. Even though we were young, we could see it in mother's face, her disapproval.'</i></p>
            </blockquote>





	The Pain of Rotting

**Author's Note:**

> I've been trying to write this for a few months now. The prompt and pairing kept popping up on DW's Porn Battle and IJ's Porn_battle, so I just had to find some way to make it stop taunting me. ^^; I even went so far as to read the book to get a better feel of the sisters (because I haven't watched the movie since it came out).
> 
> This is dark, dark, dark, and did I mention dark? Kudos if you read it though (so I don't feel like I wrote this fic for no reason, ya know?). And to repeat my tag warning - the chan here is non-explicit.
> 
> Plain - Cecilia speaking
> 
> _Italics_ \- The neighbor boys who were fascinated with the Lisbon sisters, speaking

It started as a scab in our lives - Therese hit puberty and developed breasts. Even though we were young, we could see it in mother's face, her disapproval. Which was both odd and frightening in a way.

When you pick at a scab, it hurts and sometimes makes it hard for the wound to heal. Mary, Bonnie, Lux, and eventually I too, followed Therese in puberty. Mother's agitation increased until she smiled at us with strained lips, her eyes dark and suspicious.

Sometimes, when a wound did not heal properly, it rotted. That's what happened to us - we rotted in our mother's eyes. Our youth and innocence seem to disappear to her the moment my sisters began to menstruate. Therese was the oldest and she tried to keep up appearances, but Mary and Bonnie weren't as brave. They cried when they got their menstruations for the first time. Therese did her best to soothe them, but mother looked at them with those dark, suspicious eyes as father sat by silently and it broke them, hurt them down to their very core.

Lux was the one who suggested alternate healing. Bonnie and I didn't understand, but Mary and Therese exchanged knowing glances. They closed themselves off in our room one night, long after father and mother had gone to bed while the rest of us sat in the kitchen wondering what they were discussing. Lux wouldn't answer our questions, so Bonnie and I waited in silence, rolling rosary beads between our fingers.

Mary didn't smile much the next day. Therese was silent, but Lux smiled as if she had been in the room with them the whole time. That night, Bonnie was allowed into the bedroom while Lux and I waited in the kitchen. Grabbing my hand, she plucked the rosary from my palm and kissed the empty space left behind.

"We'll have our turn soon," Lux promised, her smile beautiful and her eyes knowing.

She wouldn't answer my questions after that, only smiled and played with the flesh of my palm.

* * *

_From Cecilia's diary, we were surprised to come across some not so encripted discussions about an alternate healing plan Lox had came up with. Little made sense in Cecilia's diary to us, but the words 'scab' and 'rotting' stuck out on these pages. Whatever this plan of Lox's had been, one after the other, the sisters withdrew into themselves for a time. Only for a time though because an entry dated not more than a week and a half later talked about 'joy' and 'a midnight party'._

The rest of the entry falls back into Cecilia's odd pattern, but it seemed that whatever 'party' they had had, kept them sane for a time.

* * *

Lox whispered to us after dinner one night that we were going to have a midnight party that night. My sisters and I exchanged confused glances as Lox, with that big beautiful smile of hers, laughed and darted upstairs while we joined our parents in the den to watch a little television before prayer and then bed.

When the lights were out and an hour had past, our parents tucked into bed, father could be heard snoring faintly, Lox ran between the rooms. With a big smile, she tugged us all into her and Therese's room and closed the door quietly behind us. Therese was lighting candles decked out around the room as Lox turned the volume down on our old record player and played a record by one of the groups father frowned at. Lox and Therese had pushed their beds together as they had done when we were younger and pretended it was a grand fort. Therese sat crossed legged near her pillow while Lox bounced on the edge of her bed and motioned for Bonnie, Mary, and I to join them.

My sisters had grown taller and fuller since we had all last done this, but we still all managed to fit comfortably on the beds. I looked about the room, took in the candles and the music. Took in how close my sisters were and how beautiful Lox looked as she leaned toward Bonnie, who blushed brightly, and kissed her on the lips.

"Let the midnight party begin," Lox said to us.

Mary and Bonnie looked uncomfortable but they let Lox kiss and touch them gently and slowly. Therese bit her lip but Lox gave her this pleading look and with a sigh she leaned over and kissed Mary's neck as Bonnie claimed her mouth. Sitting there silently, I watched with a flutter in my chest as my sisters slowly began undressing each other. Observed them whimper and blush and try to look away only to find another mouth waiting for them.

I've heard of the things they were getting ready to do, but only vaguely and if it had not been for elder sisters, I still may not yet know where babies came from. Lox pulled away from the tangle of lips and limbs and crawled over to where I still sat, my fists balled on my thighs as I waited and watched.

"You haven't had your period yet," she whispered.

I wasn't sure what she was trying to get at with this but I did fear that she may have meant to leave me out of this entirely. My stomach twisted uncomfortably at that thought for some reason. Lox touched my hand, gripping it and slowly bringing it to her lips. With bated breath, I watched her eyes close as her lips pressed against my skin, the sounds of my other sisters fading into the background with the music. Even without words, I could see the thoughts of her mind as her eyes slowly opened and her lips slowly pulled away.

She wanted me the way she had had the others, but she wasn't sure if I was ready yet.

I wasn't rotting in my mother's eyes yet, not completely, but the time was coming closer without question.

If you applied cream before your skin scabbed, would it stop the hurt?

To my knees, I rose and embraced Lox, smelling flowers and sweat in her hair and skin. I loved my sisters and if they were suffering, I wanted to be there for them. My lips trembled as they touched Lox's and I could feel the eyes of the others on us. Maybe they hadn't thought it proper to bring me into the mix or maybe they were just surprised I seemed to be accepting of it. Either way, I felt Lox's hand on my neck, pulling me closer and I knew I would always belong with my sisters.

The others touched each other, but only Lox touched me. Her lips against my skin were all I felt like I would ever need again. When my body trembled against her touch and I cried out her name, I felt like I could reach up and touch the sky.

I felt like I could never rot.

* * *

_There's another partially decipherable entry about Lox, dated sometime after the midnight party. I've argued with the others as to its meaning. Basically, it tells how Lox got into trouble. Alot of trouble, for something that isn't described. It says that her mother beat her with a belt until her body was covered in welts. No one came to her aid but Cecilia and instead of being able to help, Lox pushed her away. Cecilia seemed very upset about this. The dates of the entries begin to stretch out after that and most of the writing is Cecilia's odd random stuff._

They say that Lox had gotten into trouble because of something Cecilia had done to her and that was why Lox pushed her away.

I say that Lox was trying to protect Cecilia.

* * *

Mother found Lox smoking in the backyard one night. I was sitting beside her, her hand in mine as we watched the leaves sway in the wind and the stars dance overhead. Mother had a complete fit and grabbed Lox by her hair and dragged her across the yard and inside the house. By the time I had put out Lox's fallen cigerette and got to the backdoor, mother was preaching at her, belt in hand. I opened my mouth to say something, but the belt ripped through the air and slapped against Lox's arm as she defended her face.

"Filth!" Mother screamed and brought the belt down again.

Therese and the others appeared at the doorway to the kitchen and watched the scene unfold. They stood there like I did and watched Lox get whipped again and again. She cried out so many times in pain and apology but mother wasn't listening to her.

"Explain why you would dare have one of those filthy things in your mouth."

Lox could only cry, her face veiled by her long golden hair. Tears prickled my own eyes and I stepped forward to defend Lox in anyway that I could. Mother, in her fit of rage brought up her belt and swung it down toward me. A cry of pain filled the room, but it wasn't mine. It was Lox. Her face was close to mine and I could see the hurt on her face. Saw the hurt that ran so deep down that not even a prayer could make it go away.

I saw the pain of rotting.

"Mind your business," Lox sobbed and with all her might pushed me against the backdoor.

My head hit the knob when I stumbled and things went fuzzy as mother continued her beating of Lox, now more enraged by Lox's act of violence. I closed my eyes against the pain, the fuzziness, the sounds and thought of happier moments. About my first kiss with Lox. The touches. The laughs. Nothing worked.

Things were never the same after that. Lox didn't touch me again after that. She climbed out onto the roof and sat there all night just to avoid me and the others. By the time she finally got over her pain, it was too late.

I had had my first menustration.

The rotting had begun.

There was no reason to go on. To know the kind of pain that made hell seem like bliss was a horrific thought. I only hoped my sisters would find freedom from their pain as I had decided to.

I hoped we could all find a way to make the rotting stop.

**-End-**


End file.
